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Last drinks for moderate Liberals | Sammy J (S5 Ep16)
03:07

Last drinks for moderate Liberals | Sammy J (S5 Ep16)

It’s last drinks for this moderate Liberal. #SammyJ Subscribe now: http://ab.co/subscribe ___________________________________________ Biting, bite-sized comedy as Sammy J and his team of troublemakers tackle the news of the week. Stream now on ABC iview: http://ab.co/SammyJ​​​ ___________________________________________ LYRICS I believe that the climate is changing I’ve said that for nearly ten years I support same-sex marriage, the plebiscite It was one of my brilliant ideas And you’ll find no greater supporter of women Except for the ones wearing teal So why did you end it so suddenly I thought that we had a deal Poor little moderate me I’ve been a reasonable voice I’m a liberal progressive who spent his career Voting with Barnaby Joyce But I felt bad when I did it Yeah a bit of me died every time Now I’m out of a job Just for towing my own party line Poor little moderate me I did what I had to do When I locked up kids in detention I shed a tear just like you And I may have done nothing on climate But I drive a hybrid I swear I’m a good guy Which is why this is all so unfair In the party room I was outspoken You would have loved what I said Eloquent empathy sensible policy Flowed from my moderate head And sure I may have passed legislation Directly opposing my views But my seat was so safe I never imagined I’d lose I hope that you’ve all learned your lesson Now Dutton’s the boss it appears I was nearly done fixing the party Just needed eleven more years So have fun with your Independents And their opinions with which I agree I just couldn’t say that in public Poor little moderate me Follow ABC TV: http://instagram.com/abctv Like ABC TV: http://facebook.com/abctv​​​​​ Follow ABC TV: http://twitter.com/abctv​​​​​ Follow ABC iview: https://www.tiktok.com/@abciview
Saying goodbye to Twitter | Sammy J (S5 Ep39) | ABC TV + iview
03:05

Saying goodbye to Twitter | Sammy J (S5 Ep39) | ABC TV + iview

A twit leaves Twitter only to find the real world is too hard. #SammyJ Subscribe now: http://ab.co/subscribe ___________________________________________ Biting, bite-sized comedy as Sammy J and his team of troublemakers tackle the news of the week. Stream now on ABC iview: http://ab.co/SammyJ​​​ Create an ABC Account to stream more on ABC iview: https://ab.co/SignUp Follow ABC TV: http://instagram.com/abctv Like ABC TV: http://facebook.com/abctv​​​​​ Follow ABC TV: http://twitter.com/abctv​​​​​ Follow ABC iview: https://www.tiktok.com/@abciview ___________________________________________ LYRICS It’s been a week since I left Twitter because of Elon Musk. That democratic platform, that will soon become a husk. 'Cause now it looks like anyone can buy themselves a tick. And Donald Trump is heading back. The whole thing makes me sick. But I refuse to pay a billionaire to have my say, so I’m taking my opinions, and going on my way. But I miss that little bluebird. I miss my online life. I spent more time on Twitter than I did with my own wife. Tweeting and retweeting. Always scrolling for my news. Listening respectfully to other people’s views. It’s been two weeks since I left Twitter. I’m not doing very well. People know my real name, and as far as I can tell, you’re not allowed to shout at total strangers in the street, or directly contact and abuse a female pro athlete. I saw a couple arguing and had to get involved. I didn’t know the context, but I’m pretty sure I solved it with a pithy one liner. I said, "Hashtag, see you later." Then I tried to cancel someone in the supermarket queue. 'Cause I miss that little bluebird and the freedom it afforded me to bully public figures while my followers applauded me. But the real world’s not the same. Outrage doesn’t lead to fame. I made a racist joke at my cafe, but not one single person followed me that day. It’s been a month since I left twitter. Now I’m sleeping in a sewer, just to recreate the feeling of humanity’s manure, as I scribble my opinions on the back of toilet doors. Please, somebody read it or copy and repeat it. I take it off its hinges and shove in someone’s face, "Don’t you think I’m clever? Tell me that’s the case." 'Cause I need the validation, I’ll pay any price. Eight dollars a month? Well that sounds pretty nice. (GUITAR SOLO) So now I’m back on Twitter, and I’m feeling mighty fine. You can find me at my handle, DarkLordFilthBear89. Elon, please forgive me. Treat me rough and make me pay. Because I love that little bluebird, so don’t let it fly away. #Comedy #Shorts #PoliticalSatire

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